Bryant update (i.e. becca's sad rant)....

So having a kid with Aspergers is kinda sucky sometimes. haha.  Bryant is awesome don't get me wrong, but I feel this overwhelming guilt every time I put on a show for him or write on my blog (yes I'm feeling guilt right now).  I just want to curl up in my bed and watch Downton Abbey or let him play by himself more often, but I can't because I have to teach him how to interact with others.  Sometimes I feel like nothing is helping though, for example, one of those pesty pest control guys stopped by our house this afternoon and even though he didn't even come in our house, Bryant completely freaked out until he left.  Why???? ( I know why it's just something I say in my head a lot ha). It is constant pressure to help him grow and develop normally. 

I think it has changed my outlook on life a little.  I get nervous when people tell me they are having a baby boy, just because Autism is so much more common in boys (I realize that is super cynical).  I'm terrified of having another kid because it would be devastating to have that baby hit 2 yrs old and have autism, especially when we have already been through this once.

Anywho, we are starting a new RDI therapy with him (along with the 2 preschools he is in).  I hope it helps. Want to help me out and pray for Bryant? It's starting to become this obsession that is super stressing me out.  sigh. It has been interesting to get to know other mom's in my same situation.  It IS comforting to know that they think about these things all day long like I do.  

I know this sounds like a super depressing blog post about my super depressing life, but I swear it's not.  I think Bryant is the most loving, special kid ever and I love him so much.  I just wish he would show other people how cute and sweet he is, instead of staring at them like they have 3 heads. haha.  

All right, that's enough of a rant for today.  Off to make dinner.  peace.....